The Networker #44: My #1 Book Recommendation For Networkers

22 Nov, 2023
Read time: 2 minutes & 44 seconds

I had a friend doing some work for me in the garden recently.

He was a landscaper for over 10 years.

But last year he changed industry into the world of sales and customer account management.

He asked what I’d recommend as essential reading to help.

A few came to mind.

Dale Carnegie’s How to Make Friends and Influence People being one.

But there’s another that stands out for me.

One I believe any networker should read.

One I pick up again and again.

Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazzi.

It’s a relationship building bible.

Keith’s take on networking is refreshing, systematic (in a non-cynical way), and practical.

With much you can apply to your networking.

I not only want to use today’s edition to recommend a worthwhile read.

But share my 4 keys takeaways and highlights.

Let’s dive in.

1 – Don’t Keep Score

If you do something to help someone, don’t expect anything back from them.

Or keep a mental score of what you do for them versus what they do for you.

Trust that it will come back around.

It’s the simple law of reciprocity.

Be curious, think how you can help, and do what you say.

You’ll be repaid twice over down the line.

It will if you’re surrounding yourself with the right kind of networkers.

2 – Do Your Homework

I was on the receiving end of someone ‘doing their homework’ only last week.

Someone I’d never met introduced themselves at an event and made a comment about how they saw I recently went to America.

This felt great. It showed they took an interest.

Immediately our conversation was underway.

We shared travelling anecdotes, found common traits, and eventually got onto talking about our respective businesses.

It’s no surprise we’ve already arranged another catch up to continue the conversation.

You can make others feel this way too.

There is no shortage of information at your disposal.

Use it to your advantage.

You can find out a lot about someone from a quick search on Google or LinkedIn.

Or a browse on their company website (the ‘Meet The Team’ or ‘About Us’ is a good place to try).

Finding out something interesting about someone and using it in conversation is not creepy.

It shows you care.

3 – Build It Before You Need It

If you only network when you need something, you’ll stink of desperation.

And that stink does not attract.

Others will spot it from a mile off.

You have to know where you’re going first. Who you’re looking to meet.

And be willing to invest time into building your relationships.

Where are your target market or potential referral partners networking? Who do you want to be meeting down the line?

Start connecting and building a relationship with these people now.

Build social capital. Charge their Trust Battery.

Others are far more likely to help you if they already know and like you.

Don’t start or try when you need something.

That’s too late.

4 – Follow Up Or Fail

This is Ferrazzi’s golden rule to live by when building new relationships.

Good follow-ups alone elevate you above 95% of other networkers.

And your competitors I’ll add.

Because most networkers don’t do it very well.

They may do it once by sending an email or LinkedIn message (usually copy and pasted) and then not again.

It is the single biggest way you can elevate your networking today. And stand out from your competition.

By following up that follow up. Reengaging an old conversation. Progressing a conversation.

Then ensuring you do that regularly and consistently.

Because in the follow up, and outside of the events, is where the real networking magic happens.

The Wrap Up

There’s much to take from Never Eat Alone beyond networking.

Including account management, client entertaining, and others.

But I’ve focussed on the takeaways that can be applied around your activity attending networking events.

Working on implementing or improving on just 1 of the above is a good start.

But it’s well worth a read.

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